And it gets worse …

“Here come the stars” by Mazen Kerbaj. View more of his work.

And it gets worse

Last night … last night … I don’t even know where to begin …

It seems the bombs are getting louder. Perhaps they are the new ones from the US expedited delivery.

They hit everywhere last night. Beirut, Jounieh, roads leading to the north, bridges in the north; the only highway left, leading to the north, the last escape route to Syria, was hit.

We are all trapped now. Waiting … waiting …

The bombs started around 1 am in Dahiye. We had some friends over. Everyone was in a state of panic. We waited a bit and then everyone made a run for it, to go home. One of my friends lives outside of Beirut towards the north. A trip that would usually take about 20 min, he made it in about five. Then the bombing started up again. They hit Ouzai which is the southern part of Beirut. They kept hitting Dahiye … my bed was shaking all night. The noise was so loud. Definitely not like the kind we were hearing before.

I am so drained, my head is buzzing … lack of sleep, lack of food… I am pulling myself together, but it is not easy.

- New major bridges hit: Ghazir, Adma, Batroun, Mameltain, Jbeil (all north of Beirut, all Christian areas) - Ouzai (residential area) - More Dahiye (charity institutions, NGO buildings hit) - The forest in Adma is on fire … there is not way to stop the fire, with the roads cut - Baalbeck was pounded again (there was a helicopter raid a few nights ago, they landed on a hospital, many civilians killed, several kidnapped, including a 15-year-old goat header) - Masnaa was hit again (that is the eastern road to Damascus) - They hit the electricity power station in the Be’kaa; so many people now without power there - And the shelling continues in the south; Nabatiye, Sour (Tyr), etc.

We are running out of FUEL. Soon there will be no more electricity. Soon the generators will stop working. People in hospitals will die.

The oil spill is a disaster … it has reached as far as Syria, killing everything in its path.

More and more civilians killed … more and more civilians massacred.

And the world watches on…

I have gotten many emails saying that there are people supporting us. People are behind us. People out there are making a difference. Thank you. I thank you with all my heart.

But I do know that the majority of the world is also just going about their everyday business … oh, another war in the Middle East, not our problem… switch the channel … move on to something else. “Thank God, it’s not me. Anyway, those terrorists deserve it.” They are caught up in their own everyday problems. Paying bills, taking care of the family, moving on and up in the world..

… um, can someone tell them I am not a terrorist, please?

Everyday there is a new war, so why should this one be any different? It has become so easy to say the word “war.” It has become so easy to generalize and stereotype. It is on TV everyday. It is no more a shocking event. It has become a norm or standard, and all it does is continue to breed hatred and violence.

People are making money off this war. People are going to make money off the reconstruction. Is that what is taking so long for the ceasefire to happen? Are they busy negotiating the spoils of war?

… while we sit here in pain and anxiety and sorrow and loss….

War can not be a way of life.

— This just in, the customs building at the Masnaa’ exit from Lebanon to Syria was just hit. Twelve people dead.

Even worse: Just in the news — Israel has just acquired a new fighter plane from America. It is supposed to be undetectable by radar.

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Zena el-Khalil is an installation artist, painter, curator, and cultural activist. She is the co-founder of the art collective, xanadu*, that is based in NYC and Beirut. Her blog, documenting her writing from Beirut, is located at http://beirutupdate.blogspot.com/.