blog-BNN-David-Silverman-Getty-Images.jpg

(David Silverman / Getty Images)

al Bassaleh

All the news that isn’t (satire and humor)

Potential "Free Jaggi" Campaign thankfully averted

10 January 2003

As pro-Palestinian activists weighed how they should spend their coming weekend — writing to Congress to note the over 50 Palestinians killed in December, faxing the UN to protest the lack of action over the Israeli murder of aid worker Iain Hook with sniper scopes in broad daylight, or holding felafel bake sales to raise money to feed the Gazan children because of the Israeli starvers — many breathed a silent ‘thank fuck’ as Canadian activist Jaggi Singh was released from Israeli detention. BNN’s Najeeb Al-Anbarri reports from Qatar.

When truth is funnier than fiction: The resistance of humour

Ghassan Abdullah
18 December 2002

It’s never really as bad as it looks on TV. It could always of course be much worse. The Intifada, or uprising, against Israeli military occupation with its curfews, siege, closures and general strangulation of Palestinian society, is also being done with humour. Here are a few quips picked up from people in their daily life under occupation, compiled by Ghassan Abdullah for BNN.

Arabs thankful as tornado hits Iowa

Najeeb Al-Anbarri
27 November 2002

As a massive tornado devastated central Iowa today, causing an estimated $300 million in damage, Arabs in the state expressed relief that an Arab was not determined to be behind the events. BNN’s Najeeb Al-Anbarri reports.

Canadian Foreign Ministry issues warning to naturalized camel jockeys

Laurie King
31 October 2002

Following up on warnings issued yesterday to naturalized Canadian citizens born in Syria, Iraq, Iran, Saudi Arabia, Yemen and Pakistan concerning their possible harassment, arrest, detention or deportation should they enter the United States of America, the Canadian Foreign Ministry today issued the following helpful checklist. Officials strongly urge that all Canadians unfortunate enough to have begun their lives as towel heads or camel jockeys consult this list before finalizing travel plans to or through the United States of America.

Arbitration court dismisses Berlin's patent claims on Israeli wall

Mandela Ibn Madroob
30 October 2002

Klaus Wowereit, the governing mayor of Berlin, admitted today that a judge at the London Court of International Arbitration dismissed all patent claims raised by the municipality of Berlin last summer. Judge Hubert Dunn ruled that Berlin’s patent on the Berlin Wall was “generically and fundamentally different” from the wall now being constructed by Israel.

Israeli army fears new Palestinian "Super Rock"

Avraham Avinunu
23 October 2002

Defense Ministry sources revealed today that Israel’s army is struggling to meet the threat from a Palestinian “super rock” which it is feared will decimate Israel’s tank forces in the Occupied Territories. Israeli spokesmen have long defended the use of live ammunition, tanks and helicopters against Palestinian civilians who are either unarmed, or armed with rocks, by arguing that rocks, too, can be deadly. Avraham Avinunu reports for BNN.

Apocalypse, Nu?

Laurie King
15 October 2002

Evangelicals, Likudniks, and Neo-Cons come out of the closet to battle evil, hasten the End Time—and secure Republican House seats before half the electorate is raptured out of key voting districts. BNN’s Loreh al-Malikeh goes behind the scenes of the new Goy Pride movement to ask: “What would a certain rabble-rousing itinerant preacher from Nazareth do?”

Lives of Israelis finally getting back to normal

Mandela Ibn Madroob
25 September 2002

Setting aside war and terror, Israelis are following their government’s advice and resuming their normal routines: going to work, taking kids to school, and having dinner in restaurants. And harassing Palestinians. Mandela Ibn Madroob reports from Kiryat Arba.

Bush's ghost writer: 'I made a mistake in UN speech'

Mandela Ibn Madroob
5 October 2002

Shaggy Farrel, ghost writer to US President George W. Bush, admitted that he made some crucial errors in his draft of Bush’s remarks to the United Nations. BNN’s diplomatic correspondent checks the implications.

Peruvian Teddy Bears Convert to Judaism, Move to Settlement

Avraham Avinunu
15 October 2002

Paddington Bear, beloved of children all over the world, has converted to Judaism with his tribe of teddy bears and led them from Darkest Peru to the West Bank. BNN’s Avraham Avinunu travels to Kiryat Dov and meets this famous, yet cuddly toy in his new home.

Pages

Subscribe to al Bassaleh